LOS ANGELES – Reports have surfaced that obnoxious 9 year old internet celebrity ‘Lil Tay’ has been picked up by California child protective services. According to the services, Lil Tay is a victim of “extremely poor parenting” and needs “urgent help”.
Lil Tay was picked up by child protective services Friday afternoon when service agents visited Lil Tay and her families home in Beverly Hills. Agents decided to pick up Lil Tay after one of her instagram videos was shown in the child service office. It’s reported that multiple agents immediately sprung into action and raced to Lil Tay’s home, even using emergency vehicle sirens. “We must save that girl” said Agent Chad Murphy, “we must save her before she ends up in the back of a 2002 Chevy Astro doing a low budget bdsm porno scene for half a gram of cocaine and a can of arizona ice tea at 18 years old”.
According to witnesses, Lil Tay was also calling the child service agents “broke” and “haters” as they were carrying her away. Witnesses also say the whole thing reminded them of the Rush Hour scene where Su-Yung was being kidnapped.
Lil Tay’s parents are expected to face federal charges for child cruelty and also for birthing Lil Tay, and both can face up to 20 years in federal prison.
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