Research Shows Cardi B Fans Are More Likely To Catch STDs And Cheat

LOS ANGELES – New reports have shown that Cardi B fans have a 90% higher chance of acquiring a sexually transmitted disease and cheating on their spouse.

A team of researchers from UCLA recently conducted an experiment with 200 female students, making sure that 100 of those students were big Cardi B fans (Group A), while the other 100 were not (Group B). Researchers also made sure that none of the 200 students already had a sexually transmitted disease. The 200 students were then brought back after 6 months for STD testing, however, the students were never explained the purpose of the experiment and were never aware of the STD testing, the testing was simply described as a “regular checkup”.

The results of the experiment were shocking. Of the 100 females students in group A, 92 students tested positive for an STD, meanwhile only 4 students in group B tested positive. The results were clear enough for the researchers to conclude that Cardi B fans had a 90% higher chance of acquiring an STD in only 6 months time, and experts say a whole year time would 100% guarantee an STD.

“I’m very shocked” said John Ellis, a team researcher, “not because I think the number was too high but because i thought it was low, I honestly expected all 100 of those girls to have an std”. the team of researchers also concluded that Cardi B’s music subliminally encouraged fans to engage in unsafe sex for no particular reason. psychologists labeled this cognitive tendency as the “Thot tendency”.

Are you a Cardi B fan? If you are please get checked with your physician as soon as possible.


Written by Pablo Reyes Jr

"Believe half of what you see and nothing you read online." - Pablo Reyes